George W. Bush (via last.fm) I had a couple weird dreams last night. In the first, my father and I were at a newspaper where I was recently on site. We were trying to cut through the building to save time on our way somewhere. We got lost and I fell into the press while it was running. The weirder dream had me trying to hear a speech by President Bush. I drove up to where he was speaking — it was a big, outdoor affair on the water. People were gathered around the edges of a lake, watching him on the opposite shore on a large stage. I bounced around in a little, red convertible, trying to find a place to watch. Eventually, he spoke and I missed it. Suddenly, as I was leaving the grounds, there was President Bush in the seat next to me. As we drove around looking for something to eat, we discussed how media coverage of his administration and the Obama administration has differed. He recounted all the things the mainstream media should have nailed Obama on but didn't and just kept saying "It's not fair! They were so much more critical of me than they are ...

Lots to do today, so here's a quick couple of things I wanted to mention before I forget. 1. I was in 7-11 yesterday when I noticed a man in his mid-20s walk in with twin boys who looked to be around 5'ish. Rather than walking over to the Slurpee machine like I figured they would. Instead, the man walked right to the magazine rack and started grabbing spank mags off the top shelf. The magazines, of course, were wrapped in plastic, so he just grabbed three or four and tucked them under his arm. Then to get an immediate fix, he grabbed a copy of FHM and flipped through it to take a look at the pictures of girls in their lingerie. I find myself noticing things like this more often now that I have my own little one on the way. I don't think you're ever going to find me taking my kid with me to the store to buy porn. Best shirt ever. 2. I had a bizarre dream last night that I got hired by some cult leader to be her assistant (which, by the way, why do you never see a female cult leader?) Anyway, this woman got ...

I just got back from scenic Port Clinton, Ohio. It was great to be able to catch up with Rojo Grande. We drank at a couple local places, watched Oklahoma get schooled by USC and then crashed out. Overall, it was a night well-spent. Beyond that, and I don't know if it was the bourbon all the fumes I breathed in from being so close to Lake Erie, but I had the strangest dreams. There were three that I remembered upon waking up and two that I remember now (I'm wracking my brain to remember the other one, to no avail.) Anyway, let me share and see what you think. Dream 1: I'm a member of the Mighty Ducks (stop laughing). Anyway, we're walking into some outdoor stands in the American south to scout a team we'll be playing the following week. Upon walking up into the rickety, wooden stands, I realized that we were watching the Texas A&M hockey team. While we're watching, people keep coming up under the stands trying to steal our hockey gear by pulling it through the slats under the bleachers. After a while, we got sick of watching the game (we couldn't figure out how, in ...

I had the strangest dream last night. the Intern and I were hanging out. We were walking up a street that looked like a mix of the touristy strip in Mackinaw City but with Detroit landmarks as all the buildings. For some reason, even though she's from Detroit, I was showing her the sites, telling her "interesting" stories about the landmarks (I say "interesting" because what I think are interesting tidbits of trivia usually are just a bore.) Anyway, we're walking down the street and this small group of Latino teenagers begins saying all manner of vulgar things to her and as I start telling them they'd better stop or shit's going to go down, one of them slaps her across the face. As she starts crying I begin to chase them and catch up to two of them at a house across the street that looks like it was a saloon pulled from the set of Gunsmoke. Out on the back porch, I tackle the kid who slapped the Intern and begin to tie him up when the other jumps out of some kind of swamp that ran alongside the building. I saw him pull a gun, and so ...

I've got a lot of things on my plate today, so I'm just going to go Larry King on you again. Get ready for the incoherent, disconnected thoughts. The woman is out of my life and yet, months later, the dreams persist. Last night we were on a date and ran around doing all the things we used to do when we actually got along. We got dinner, drinks, saw a show and just talked for hours. It was almost like it was real and it freaked me out because I kept calling her by her name but I don't think that at any point in my dream I actually saw her face. This is the second time that I can remember this happening. The CD I made for Peanut and Peanut's wife-to-be isn't working on his CD player, which is strange. The files are saved as AAC files, should this be working or did I save them in a format that only works on mp3 players? I tried to make a CD that was appropriate for both of them. I filled it with songs that remind me of one or both of them. The track listing is as follows. 1. Have you written ...

I just had this strange dream, like something out of the end of an 80s John Hughes flick. I was graduating from college with a post-graduate degree and I was trying to dig up dirt from my front yard to put in a flower plant. The pot was huge, and I was digging up dirt to repot the African violet I've had in a butter dish since I lived in Oklahoma. On my first attempt to dig up the dirt, once I filled the pot it all turned into stuffed animals. I dumped it out and as I was filling it up again, I was joined by all my friends from college. None of the friends in my dream was anyone I know, all were rather nondescript in the kind of way people you see at the mall are. They all looked plain and clearly I've forgotten already any distinguishing features they may have had, like I only saw them in passing. The one thing I do remember is the diversity. There was a black couple (he had glasses,) a hippy girl and a few others who were too plain to remember. We talked about moving on and starting a new ...

Before I head down to Franco's for the Lions game, I'm going to go Larry King on you and just start spitting out random, unrelated thoughts. 1. I learned a long time ago that the best way to avoid seeing something that makes you uncomfortable is to not look at it. If you're embarrassed about what you've done in the past, for example, and it's documented somewhere, don't go reading and re-reading it. 2. I'm still looking for the following Jude songs: Everything is OK and Everything I own. 3. I had this strange dream last night where I was the spokesman for an NFL team who had the first pick in the draft. The problem was, I didn't know who we wanted to draft, and for some reason didn't even know any of the top prospects. To make matters worse, when I finally thought I figured out who we should pick, I tried to announce it from the podium and realized I had no voice. So I asked Lou Holtz, who was dressed in all Notre Dame gear, to help me. When he got up to the podium, I pointed to the name of the player I wanted to draft and he ...