For a long time, I was convinced that if all the "nice guys" around the world got together and elected a leader, I'd have been in the running. I was the epitome of the nice guy. I had a huge crush on a girl in college that never came to fruition for all the typical "nice guy" reasons. Namely, I had already set up shop in Friendsville. When she was sick, I brought soup. When she was wasted, I tucked her in and brought her water. When she needed a friend to go shopping with, I was at the mall. When she dated losers, I listened to her problems. Eventually, I met another girl and managed to take those "nice guy" traits I had honed pursuing my crush and use them to be what I thought was the nicest, most thoughtful boyfriend in history. The problem was, I was trampled underfoot because I was far too concerned with her feelings and the state of what was a really turbulent relationship to even think twice about how I felt. My experience has led me to this conclusion, there are two kinds of guys in this world: Guys who are able to take ...

When I was editor in chief of my college paper, there was a popular myth around campus that I was a male-chauvinist to the nth degree. My girlfriend at the time, who was quite vocal about her support and concern for women's issues, heard it in class all the time. My fictional disdain for members of the fairer sex was a popular topic of discussion in the Women's Center and even spread to informal meetings of progressive-minded women off campus. At one point during the year, my friend Loc called me and said he had gone for a late-night snack at Denny's with a friend from his residence hall. Upon getting to Denny's, they met up with a group of women students from Eastern who were in the middle of a heated discussion about, of all things, my sexist views. I didn't know any of the women, and yet, as someone in the public eye (regardless of how small that spotlight may have been,) my personal views and actions were up for discussion. Throughout the course of my journalism career, both in college and in the professional realm, I've seen responses to my work that vary from high praise to death ...

So this is 2004's last hurrah. Are you as glad to see this year be gone as I am? As a special treat, here's my year in review. January: The year started with me alone at Peanut's wife-to-be's. Granted, I was surrounded by friends, but my supposed girlfriend was off in Port Huron with Mike, the effeminate heterosexual. A brief phone call at about 1 a.m. did little to bolster my confidence in my relationship. A few days later, I accompanied her to her friend's wedding, where she became determined to get engaged within the year. At work, I got a nice raise and more responsibilities. We also found out one of my several bosses, Boss #2 Marks, was pregnant and would be out all summer on maternity leave. Finally, I began a weekly habit of playing poker with friends from college that continues to this day. It's a nasty little habit that I've become a lot better at. February: EB and I cemented our relationship and vowed to once again be committed for the long run. The slow process of learning my job and all of its responsibilities was finally, six months in, starting to take shape. March: I made my second, ...

Have you seen the commercials for African Euphoria? I don't know if I can express how funny they are, but they tip the unintentional comedy scale. African Euphoria is a hair braiding salon, and the commercials just show people walking around trying to look fabulous with their hair braided. The best is when they show the white people. The white guy they show, who is smiling like Michael Jackson at a Chuck E. Cheese, looks like someone dumped a bag of black licorice on his head. It's pretty damn funny, although I'm sure I didn't do it justice. Last night I was fortunate enough to be able to hang out with the Witt and Drunken Jill at 336 Main. Drunken Jill, who apparently is a border cop now, always makes for good times. The Witt is absolutely brilliant and irresistibly sweet. Poor Drew, he fucked things up big time, I hope he can rebound from this, he's too nice a guy to have a drunken proposal be his legacy. So it's New Year's Eve, eve and I still don't have plans. I've got a few options, but nothing that has jumped out at me. Specifically, I guess I just want to spend ...

I had the strangest dream last night. the Intern and I were hanging out. We were walking up a street that looked like a mix of the touristy strip in Mackinaw City but with Detroit landmarks as all the buildings. For some reason, even though she's from Detroit, I was showing her the sites, telling her "interesting" stories about the landmarks (I say "interesting" because what I think are interesting tidbits of trivia usually are just a bore.) Anyway, we're walking down the street and this small group of Latino teenagers begins saying all manner of vulgar things to her and as I start telling them they'd better stop or shit's going to go down, one of them slaps her across the face. As she starts crying I begin to chase them and catch up to two of them at a house across the street that looks like it was a saloon pulled from the set of Gunsmoke. Out on the back porch, I tackle the kid who slapped the Intern and begin to tie him up when the other jumps out of some kind of swamp that ran alongside the building. I saw him pull a gun, and so ...

I thought about it all day, and at least EB didn't run off with some dude because she's pregnant with his kid like my friend Porter's buddy Steven. That said, I inadvertently drove through Canton today on my way from my hockey game (which we won, putting us at 5-0), to hang out with Mike Miller. I've been doing my best to avoid thoughts of this sort lately, because I knew that combined with the holiday it would be a debacle. Anyway, I just wanted to put these thoughts down somewhere and get them out. I was thinking, on my drive to Mike's, about what could have been had I tried to fight a little harder or if EB were to call me up tomorrow and say she's moving back and wants to get back together (which I know, is beyond the realm of possibility.) This isn't going to get pathetic, so just follow me here. The thing is, I was thinking about what my life would be like if that scenario was to play itself out. Here's what I came up with: I'm sure I would have spent the next several months, if not years, and perhaps the rest of my life, ...

With Christmas squarely behind us, our thoughts inevitably turn to plans for the new year. For most that means we will be declaring, and ultimately giving up on, some sort of resolution. I've always been the kind of person who is far more effective at getting things done if I feel beholden to someone else to get results. That said, I thought I'd share my resolutions here, and perhaps it would help me keep them. I've got a week until they officially take effect, and I intend on not starting them until Jan. 1 to make them official. To that end, you're going to see some changes in this space in the coming year. Most notably, you're going to notice that I will use this space as a personal accounting of my exercise and diet program. A year from now, you will see far less of me than you do now. I haven't decided whether the updates will come regularly or sporadically, but there will be some kind of kickoff next Saturday. I'm going to outline my rules, I hope you'll do your best to hold me to them. Secondly, I'm going to use this space less and less for silly updates ...