Date Added

Tuesday, March 31st, 2009

Posted In

Humor

Tagged

Funny stuff

Enlightening girls on urinal etiquette.

Bogey: ok so, I need clarification on something.
Me: ok
Bogey: this is about guys: is it true (and I’ve been told this by several guys) that if you’re going to use the urinal, you need to have at least one urinal between yourself and the guy next to you?
Me: yes, absolutely
Me: that’s why, if you go into a restroom and there is nobody at the urinal, you always use the one on the end
Bogey: ahh
Bogey: right
Me: because that ensures that if it fills up, you only have to pee next to one guy and not two
Bogey: now what if the urinals are full? is that when it is appropriate to use the stall? because some of my friends have told me that if you DO use a stall, you have to give up some of your man card.
Me: naw, if all the urinals are full, it’s ok
Bogey: haha ok
Me: but that’s only if the urinals are all full
Me: your friends are right, if there are urinals open, but you go into the stall, you get the corner cut off of your man card
Bogey: hahaha
Bogey: but see, Ryan has told me exceptions of the rule…like in places you can’t help. liiiike the Palace or Comerica where they have a trough
Bogey: and you’re kind of limited to space.
Me: nope
Me: no exceptions
Bogey: yeah, he always waits
Bogey: if it’s going to be full of wang
Bogey: lol
Me: oh, and i think the joe is the only one that has a trough any more
Bogey: yes! that’s what I’m thinking of.
Me: but even so, there are no exceptions.
Bogey: you crack me up
Me: if it’s a trough, and there’s space, you have to use it
PM Bogey: yeah
Bogey: that makes sense.
Me: if it was good enough for our fathers and grandfathers, it’s good enough for us
Bogey: lOL
Bogey: well that’s what i mean, even if there’s a trough, you have ot man up and stand next to some dude if it calls for it
Bogey: although you NEVER look over.
Bogey: that’s just wrong or something
Me: yeah, it’s like an elevator
Me: you look forward and STFU
Bogey: and the whole reason this was brought up was because I was telling Michelle about my bathroom visit and how the boss was talking to me while I was going., it was hella awkward.
Bogey: LOL.
Me: wait, what?
Me: hahahahaha. seriously?
Me: i don’t even let my wife talk to me while i’m in the bathroom
Bogey: I ran into her on my way to the bathroom
Bogey: and she said hi and all that jazz and then followed me into the bathroom
Bogey: we went into our respective stalls and she proceeded to TALK TO ME WHILE I WAS PEEING
Bogey: I mean, I don’t even do that with my girl friends iif we pile into a bathroom in packs.
Bogey: exactly.
Bogey: let alone your BOSS.
Me: wow. just wow.
Bogey: yeah it’s not right.
Bogey: some people can’t pee if they’re talked to. I’m not that kind of person, but I don’t feel like talking about work stuff while I”m doing my thang.
Bogey: OMG
Bogey: I just told Ryan all this and he asked me which rule about urinals since there are mulitple
Bogey: wow, guys are weird.
Bogey: “if you are peeing in the far left urinal why the fuck would someone pee in the one next to you if there are 4 others”
Me: exactly
Me: if you are peeing on the far side
Me: it is the next guy’s duty to take the urinal on the far other side
Bogey: wow
Bogey: the things you just know as a guy
Bogey: lol
Me: subsequent guys must fill in the spots, doing their best to leave room between themselves and others
Me: yeah, i don’t even know who taught me this
Me: i think it’s like birds just knowing how to build a nest
Bogey: hahaha